Christmas. I hate holidays. All this busyness shopping, silly smiling children who, under the Christmas tree did not find what you wymarzyły, as well as throughout the city Santas, lying in wait for the opportunity to hold a toddler on his knees, he sucks nawciskać of the elves and dull, and then pluck his parents so that they can not afford it was for gifts. They do not really hate. Worse still, always around Christmas, I get the worst case. That was it this time ...
sat it's in his office and drank whiskey. Legs expertly put on your desk - it's just in case a client unexpectedly opened the door and pleading voice began to ask for the best private detective in the city (or me) for help. But instead I heard the creaking of the door bell phone. I picked practiced the most traffic, and said a hoarse, low voice, for which at this moment that i could 'Detective Agency "AC Milan". How can I help? ". "Good morning, sir." Said a male voice in the earpiece, "I am calling from the command of Count Moravian Junior. " "Yes ..." I said resolutely, "I understand ... What happened? ". Moments later, I learned everything. Well, maybe not everything, but enough so that I would know what the problem is. Of course I accepted the request - the count was well-known citizen of our city and what is important, equally famous as he was his generosity. So I told her visit in the evening and asked that this time Do not do anything from the crime scene.
Driving to the villa of Count I was thinking about this issue. Theft - as if nothing unusual. Around the holidays there are always more than usual. Known, then more people are busy planning Christmas dinner rather than security of their homes. Emboldens many thieves in this period to the extent that dress up as Santa Claus and in this disguise, profaning the sanctity of the Holy carry crime. If you meet misery of ordinary citizens, all engaged in the police, after a month that usually closes the case for lack of evidence (who will be chased up for Santa Claus? After policemen are adults, most people who do not believe in Santa since he denounced his father, tearing his beard in front of wadding the whole family). But when the dying countess collected Morawska, wife of the richest dziewięćdziesięciolatka in the city, then he stops to count only on the efficiency of law enforcement and the public are invited to someone who knows his stuff. A true professional, Tuz over tuzami. Me.
"Hello sir. Count expects to come with me, "greeted me butler, dressed in a tailored suit, the best I've ever seen. He was of medium height, somewhat thickish, about forty years. Following behind him I had the opportunity to look at how to put these steps. (This is extremely important. A skilled investigator can tell a man by the observation of his gait. I learned this art from a certain Indian, whom I met once on New Year's Eve ball - still remember the solemnity with which I was demonstrating the various types of steps). He walked posuwiście, but with dignity. Hmm ... In any case I decided to inquire about the Count.
first thing I saw upon entering the spacious living room, this ... Countess Isabella. I then thought that it was impossible for the young and beautiful woman was the wife that this is an old man, sitting in a rocking chair and looking at me through thick spectacles. "I see that you liked my wife," the word count meant that I stopped to stare at Isabella's neck and the jaw back into place, right at the top. "Please forgive me, Excellency, but I do not like to waste time and, therefore, somewhat rudely, I admit, I took up oględzinami scene. I think on this beautiful neck hung collected when ... "I began to explain, but the count interrupted me rather sharply," No way, young man! They lay in the safe. " Aha.
While Earl was showing me how many safe and explained that he did not have security, Isabel looked at me like most women, when they see me the first time. I knew that my profession has itself awakens unbridled desire in women, with a pleasant appearance and intellect, which have, not to mention. Not surprised me more fire in her eyes and quivering lips. Using the bustle of the old case of missing Earl of trinkets, sent the countess 'wink'. She laughed out loud, what the count responded by saying, "Izabelo, baby! I do not see anything funny in the fact that we were robbed! In addition, the fact that the thief bypassed all security unmistakably indicates that he knew very well about them and that will be able to beat them again. This time we took the jewelry, the next time you can take someone's life. "
"I understand that the suspects you have someone in the immediate area ...".
"That's right."
I thought it was an appropriate time to ask the Count about his strange gait butler.
"Can I noticed a strange gait Henry?" Repeated my question Moravian Junior Earl "Actually no ... I believe that it is normal, it can mess a little too much nose, but it happens among the distinguished lackeys. "
"Is Henry was at home when the theft occurred?" I asked opening notebook.
"Yes. Like the rest of the service, "replied the count.
"The rest of the service, that is, who?" I did not let just anything to sell (in the end if I have to resolve this matter, I know all about all, the detective, as with the priest in confession, you can not have secrets, if you want is that his effort was not fruitless.)
"Darling," asked the Count Isabella "give you the names, you know that I can not remember them all."
"Of course, Arthur," replied the countess, "The rest, that Maria, our maid and a cook at the same time, and Jan - the gardener."
Maria proved to be a young maiden as much as pyskatym. When I tried to talk to her, said she now has a play and if I want, I can come in the morning, but it's best if you'll give her peace of mind, because she still knows nothing, and in addition does not like me. What could I do? In this situation listened to the gardener. It was a freak what little true original. I think it confused the age of his head (he was older than the count). When I went to his kanciapy, sat at a small table and played with him in the "ten questions". Losing ... introduced myself, but he did not pay the slightest attention to me.
"Is this an actor?" He asked himself, to respond to the express satisfaction "No, not the actor. You were only five questions. "And when I thought I would not know anything, he spoke to me as if we were talking I do not know how long," When I was Earl and the butler never stolen anything! Never! Do you understand? ".
"Yes," he mumbled, "And when was that?"
"Oh, not so long ago ... I'm not so old as I look ... Well, well, my master decided that at my age is time to take care of flowers and stuff, not serious work. I only regret that it has hired someone so ... so ... "
" Suspect? "suggested Henry remembering gait.
"That's right! After-Dej-row-ne-go! I have already spoken JW. Earl and I will tell you that too - this whole Henry, son of a gun which is not enough! I do not trust him one bit! And now forgive you, I have to finish the game. "Said John, and then returned to the previous theme," In that case, the policies? ".
left John and I decided to go home to think himself all in turn. Of course, at that time already had a reputation that such an opinion about the whole matter, but I wanted more contact with conducting a parallel investigation into a policeman. Interested me some information which he could have. So I said goodbye to the Count, Countess, and no, of course (a bit przydługo hold of her hand and looked straight into her eyes, to which she responded unambiguous flutter of long, black eyelashes.)
The next day I went to the police station. It highlighted the case officer on duty and asked him to contact investigators officer (unfortunately, I did not know his name, hence the need for settlement of all duty.) Duty officer dialed the right number, something whispered, and finally told me to wait a while, and that I have unpaid mandate from last year. Żachnąłem for such impertinence, and said that probably does not know who he is dealing. He replied that he knows and that I should pay. Zbluzgałem him terribly, and therefore arranged for the officer waited in detention.
"I'm pushy," said szczurowato looking man with a gun pinned on the bar, and knew that it was clay, and does not pander, which are close in my cell.
"Thank you for your honesty," I said.
"You misunderstand me. My name: pushy. Lt. pushy. You wanted to see me, "explained the cop.
"And, this pardon," apologized politely, because I know how to keep, when to repeat the blunder.
brazen was nice enough that not only answered my questions, but also arranged for me to cancel the mandate, for which he bought when it was after all, a bottle of cognac, which in turn led to the initiation of an investigation of police corruption (it seems that I gave the cognac with some officers from the inside), no and again came to his cell, this time with a pushy, who was there really screwed (and I say "screwed" is you know what I mean ...). But that's another story ...
learned namely that chillin 'Maria, despite her young age, has a rich past. She was in her record full of images (profile, en face ) - Brazen joked that it is actually an album (actually, looking at the pictures you can see how podlotki girl becoming a woman.) Most were moral issues, but once or twice she was arrested for petty theft in a supermarket. I asked him how is it possible that such a person was employed at the Earl, as a conspiratorial whisper, brazen, "said that Mary was included in the witness protection program and did not really named Maria, and even her entire file is fraudulent and part of her new personality, a Earl knows what, because in the "previous" life, she was his wife. Explained that, where this play in regular maid. So I asked about Isabella.
"Ah! Beautiful Isabella! Earl married her after he buried his previous wife, or Mary, who is not really called Maria ... Isabella had him replace it, "explained pushy.
"But why? But Maria, who did not really named Maria, and so it is with him all the time! "
" fact. But Earl does not go up to the adoption of the maid, much less the same ... You understand life in the higher spheres takes place according to strict rules ... "
" I understand, "I said, though I did not understand. I thought only that Isabella must be terribly lonely and unhappy and that I'm the guy who can give her happiness, though not necessarily find her jewelry.
"You?" Surprised brazen "The Lord be kidding. The mystery of the Count I can tell you that Isabella has an affair with Jarek - her ex-boyfriend. He now is a driver Earl "
" The driver? Nobody told me not to have the driver "was indignant.
"No wonder. Isabel will not remind him to count, which is incredibly jealous and if something zwęszył, just wants to fight a duel with Jarek, and you must know that the old Moravian Junior is a great scorer. Moreover, thanks to it only for myself, because I count as I move out of the house, then he drives a car, "wyłuszczył me everything pushy.
"Oh, Henry ... is such a strange gait ... "I added.
"You noticed it," he said, looking at me with appreciation the brazen "Unfortunately, clean as a whistle. Wonderful references, impeccable service ... Either fair or a genius of crime. "
went back to the office completely confused. It was late afternoon, and the window began to sprinkle snow. Normal for this time of year. From my brief reverie blurted out knocking on the door. It was Isabella. She was wearing an elegant fur coat with mink. By the head flashed to me that maybe the bottom is only lace underwear, or nothing at all.
"Can not you look at me so persistently in the neck?" Her words brought me to the ground.
"Sure," I said with dignity, "What brings me lady?". And before she could reply threw with himself, "And please, do not fool me for these tricks! I know everything about you. About you and o. .. Jarku. Do not be afraid, do not I give you. At least if the point. Now tell me where ukryliście collected? "
"What?" - Sly Art wanted to beat me off for better effect and pressed his hand to his chest geometric panel.
"Do not pretend you do not know what's going on. Game over. Looked through you, "my heart krajało when I said that, but the truth has always been closer to me than happiness, even their own," You and your lover ukradliście collected. Where are they now are. "
" It's absurd! Why would I steal something that belongs to me? "
" You mi to say "I quit resolutely" baby. "
"You're crazy" when she saw it, that is not as pretty as I thought, and he has crooked teeth (slightly, but still).
"I know like you ..." sat comfortably in a chair and threw her legs on the desk, just like at the beginning of the story "go out to marry an older, wealthy Count of Moravian Junior and waiting when you are rich, young widows. And when you get tired of waiting, steal expensive gems, to evaporate the with them to the Antipodes, where shako have your lover, dressed in a garland of flowers and calls out "Aloha!"
"I do not know why I came to you. Only time I lose ... "
" And actually what you've come? "
" I wanted to show you what I found in. .. it dropped out of the pocket of Henry ... "in the outstretched hand holding a piece of old newspaper. The paper was yellow and very wrinkly. You could see the title of the article (something like a "Mafioso Arrested! Witness incognito - dear husband Count Arthur Morawski Jr. - made incriminating testimony ") and a photo with someone confusingly similar to Henry, only younger, handcuffed, was led by two policemen in uniform.
"This is a piece of meaningless"
"But ... Are you absolutely sure? "Isabella was surprised.
"Dear lady! I am a professional. The fact that your butler like old newspapers proves nothing. You can sleep peacefully. In addition, it has no connection with the theft of jewels " reassured her. "As to the lady i. .. Jarka, you still do not trust. I warn you, I'll have you in the eye. You make a mistake, and I will be prepared for it. Now I'm leaving you, ma'am. "
When closed the door behind her grief poured into my heart. I saw her again through the window as she walked among the more and more falling snow.
next day was Christmas Eve. The unresolved question was heavy on me terribly and I spent long hours in meditation. Just before the first Star decided to go to the count's house and look around - not to mention, of course, anything to anyone.
parked the car at the rear of the residence. Snow crunched under my feet when I walked by the wall surrounding the house Moravian. "It must feel Santa Claus" I thought, and sour smile appeared on my lips. I walked through the garden groping hands, the road ahead - in the meantime it got dark, and I cursed at myself for that, I did not take with him a flashlight. A few minutes later I saw a faint light ahead of someone's flashlight. I began to walk toward him. When I went up a bit, I heard a voice.
"Yes, my beauty. This is for you, "it was the voice of John, the old gardener," Are not they wonderful? Tell me ... Yes, yes, I know - not as wonderful as you. But it's still the greatest thing that I could give you for Christmas "
tried to come closer to see to whom he tells the old gardener. Well, I was curious what a gift made his beloved. Took steps quietly as I could (if he saw me at the moment Indian, is used to krokologii, uśmiałby at niemiara, because I played was, unintentionally, a human gait terrorized by his wife, mother and a dog at a time). John does not hear me. Still he said.
"You look divine! I'm so happy! I do not think I could be happier than at this moment - the moment! - I could, I just got rid of the usurper and bandit Henry! "
At this point, I saw everything very clearly and I ścierpła skin throughout the body, because I realized what a terrible mistake I made, blaming poor Isabel! Old spoke to opatulonego snow, handsome shrub roses, which hung stolen collected Countess Morawska, flashing all the colors of the rainbow in the light of the December moon ...
what was then - you know. Congratulations, handshakes (Isabel kissed my cheek and I'm sure that if it was not Jared, which incidentally never once met the old count porzuciłaby junior and spent the rest of your life with me) and, importantly, the fees, which reassured my belief that my work makes sense.
end
Oh, one more thing. A few days later - exactly in the New Year's Eve, which because of the cognac that I spent in the custody of the city - House JW. State Moravian suffered some other misfortune. Well, someone (probably criminal) using exploding firecrackers and the sound of fireworks shot unnoticed poor Mary, who did not really name was Maria. Not quite on the same day, or rather night, disappeared without a trace of Henry Butler - in my humble opinion, kidnapped for ransom. But that's another story ...
[first edition: phrase 2006]
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